Fun double brick prior to today’s club Happy Hour...
After pre-HH Hains Pt. ride, meet at “Obey the Law” electronic stop sign at Ohio Drive. Slip over the metal railing, and head out across the inlet to Cantina for rail drinks.
Wetsuit optional, but wearing of brightly colored swim caps highly recommended due to boat traffic in channel.
Pause in middle of channel for National Harbor swimmers coming the ten miles upriver from their regular Thursday workout, then swim to HH together.
Due to short length of channel swim, about 300 meters, support kayaks will link up and provide a “hop and skip” run option for those wishing to do a bike-run brick.
A former club vice president, now ranking officer of a US Navy destroyer, is in town, and will provide protection to swimmers against errant boaters with her vessel, which has sailed thru the Panama Canal and up the Chesapeake to DC for this purpose.
Boaters entering the swim lane will be met with following actions, in descending order: 1) sharp blast of ship horn; 2) .50-caliber machine gun warning-shot ; 3) 5-inch gun artillery rounds; 4) Harpoon anti-ship missiles; 5) Cruise missiles, conventional; 6) Cruise missiles, nuclear.
(In the event of the latter’s use, swimmers are encouraged to stay in the briney water for several extra minutes, to wash away any radioactive traces. Those who have swum at Lake Anna, with its onshore nuclear reactor, have built up sufficient immunity to skip this step.)
Under any conditions, the water quality of the waterfront slip is suspect, so swimmers are encouraged to order Margaritas at the HH, and gargle with the salt.
NTPers note: For this, the club’s first summer outdoor HH, they must, under DCT bylaws, buy free drinks for club veterans.
Also note that anyone actually believing this post must buy drinks for the entire bar...:)