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Ironman Vietnam this Sunday
CREATED: 10/13/10 by dsgrunning REPLIES: 14
dsgrunning's ravatar dsgrunning    JOINED: 2/28/09    POSTS: 1312
Ironman Vietnam this Sunday
POSTED: 10/13/10 10:26 AM

All,

I'm organizing a ride this weekend. Everyone is welcome to join. It's a free ride. High Cloud will sponsor us with free gels, energy bars, and other food at the start/transition/finish line. Please drop me an email at number55555@yahoo.com if you are interested in comming.

Below is the email that I sent out earlier today to my Sunday bike group. It has all the details that you need.

Tuan

===========================================
SUNDAY BIKE RIDE WITH THE VERTICAL SWIMMER
Star Date: Week 17
===========================================

Hello Athletes of the Second Annual Ironman Vietnam,

This is race week so I'm sending out the weekly email a day early. The farce known as Ironman Vietnam has come upon us. It's the event that we've all been training for all year. For some, this is just another race. For others, it is a cumulation of a lifetime of hopes and dreams. 2010 Kona AG slots will also be available so the competition will be fierce.

For those who are not familiar with the format or the rules of engagement of this event. Let it be known that this is a 0.0 mile wetsuit legal swim, followed by a 112 mile draft legal bike, and followed by a 26.2 meter run. Wetsuit strippers will be on hand to assist you after the swim. It will be a mass start swim so please be prepared for the carnage that is associated with it. In accordance to the rules governed by Vertical Kingdom, LLC, there will be an aquavelo division, relay, and Ironman Vietnam 70.3 option.

**** Please let me know if you are coming ****

=============
RACE DETAILS
=============

Starting Location: Great Marsh Park, Cambridge, MD - This is the site of the transition area of the Eagleman 70.3 course. If you don't know where this is, look it up on the Eagleman 70.3's web page. Everyone doing this event will be driving there in the morning so no worries about trying to find a hotel or a hooker. We will meet in the parking lot in the transition area next to the water. If you are not litterally parked next to the water, you are not parked in the correct location.

Time: Meet at 8:30 AM on Sunday October 17th, 2010. Mass swim starts promptly at 9:00 AM. We will start promptly since it's going to be a long day for those of us who are going the full distance. I wanted the later start because it's a longer drive and I want folks to have some extra sleep the night before. It's going to be a long day so the extra rest will pay more dividends than the earlier start.

Swim Course: As the Thais would put it ... same same but different from the Eagleman swim course

Bike Course: 2x of the Eagleman bike course for the people doing the full. 1x for folks doing the half.

Run Course: Parking lot to the port-a-john is exactly 13.1 meters. That's the turnaround point. Run anymore than that and I will bitch slap you. Becky has already made reservation for the bitch slap. She will be running for an hour after the ride. If anyone wants to join her, please let me know so that I can clear my calendar.

Contact Info: My cell is 301-613-3972 in case you need to reach me in the morning.

Rules: There are no rules.

Clothes: Bring the whole repertoire. It will be cold in the morning and warmer in the afternoon. You can shed the warm gear after loop #1.

SAG and food support: Bring your own hoochie, sugar daddy, or domestic help. Don't expect Vietnamese #1 to be sharing any of his imported nutritional goodies. Marinated water buffalo testicles are not easy to get pass customs. There are a very very very very very few places along the route where you can stop to refuel so bring enough to last 56 miles. Who am I kidding? There are no places along the route for you to refuel.

Cue sheet: The course will be clearly marked with a blue "EM" paint marking on the road and near key turns. If you missed any of them ... you are an idiot. If you know that you are an idiot to begin with, go here for the bike cue sheet:
http://www.dctriclub.com/uploads/file/Eagleman%20course%20cue%20sheet.pdf

Cost: free

Pace: Find someone to stick to. The people that have signed up so far look like folks who are planning to do around 6-6:15 hour-ish pace for the 112 mile journey. Courtney Fulton wants to do it in 5.5 hours. I may need to slash her tires or key her car before we start.

Pace accordingly or you will bonk during the 26.2 meter run. This is a dropped ride. It means that if you can't find anyone to stick to, you will be left behind and you will become somebody's domestic help. This is an IM simulation ride for many of us. This means that I plan to get off my bike and water the plants whenever I feel like it.

Drafting: I'm doing IMFL so my drafting game plan will be in full effect. Don't waste your energy trying to get rid of me with hand gestures or other means. It won't work. I've been practicing this all year. I'm in prime and peak IM drafting condition.

Post Race Meal: We will head somewhere afterward to sit down and eat a damn big meal before going back home.

**** Please let me know if you are coming ****

============
CAR POOLING
============

One of our participants, Carol Cohen, needs a carpool ride to Cambridge. If you can help out, please let me know and I can put you in contact with her. She lives in the Clarendon area. For those who have been on this email distro list since the beginning of the season ... you all know how I feel about Arlington women. If you are going to pick her up, bring your own leather and a rooster.

=======================
PARTICIPANTS' PROFILE
=======================

Those of you who are training for IMAZ, IMFL, IMCoz, or B2B (full or half), this is the perfect training ground for those races. It's windy and flat. You will be severely bitch slapped by the wind. Crying won't help. If you are planning to do any of the above mentioned IMs next year, this event will allow you to get a taste of what it's like to go 112 miles on a bike under flat and blistering wind conditions. It will also allow you to feel what it's like to walk like you have an STD. What the heck am I saying. You all are peasants and some of you are women who live in Arlington. You already know what that feels like.

Those of you who have signed up for Eagleman next year, this is the perfect opportunity for you to find out what that bike/run course is all about. Get a preview of the course now so that you know how to train for that course next year.

We had 20+ people signed up last year so I'm hoping for something near that number this year. Granted, there were more people doing later season IMs last year but I better looking this year so things even out.

Case in point, the following people have expressed interests so far:
Tuan (IMFL)
Becky H (IMFL)
Courtney F (IMCoz)
Carol C (B2B - Full)
Debra (IMCoz)
Melissa T (B2B Full?)
Michelle W ?

If you noticed, it's an all female crew. I sure hope they don't expect me to share my feelings before, during, or after the ride. For the love of God, please don't ask me if I want to go for a post race pedicure.

Ed Moser hasn't signed up yet but you know that he will be there ;)

We need 15 more people or a kitten will be sacrificed. I'm just kidding of course ... but no not really. For all of the PETA members out there: Whatever you do, don't visit Vietnam ... I'm just saying.

**** Please let me know if you are coming ****


===========================
FOR THE SILVER SPRING GROUP
===========================

Squirrel Nation of Rock Creek, get your wills ready. You shall be eaten by an Ironman Vietnam finisher.


Tuan, Ironman Vietnam organizer, finisher, and someone who, when it's all said and done, is really better than you.

mosered's ravatar mosered    JOINED: 2/28/09    POSTS: 1770
RE: Ironman Vietnam this Sunday
POSTED: 10/13/10 1:22 PM

Hmm, kind of busy this weekend, but would like to get in another century somewhere, hmm.

kev7's ravatar kev7    JOINED: 2/28/09    POSTS: 459
RE: Ironman Vietnam this Sunday
POSTED: 10/13/10 3:56 PM

Kind of like the idea of riding 35 laps of Hains Point...

Probably just ride out to Poolesville instead. I am still recovering from last weekend's bike crash!

Kevin

dsgrunning's ravatar dsgrunning    JOINED: 2/28/09    POSTS: 1312
RE: Ironman Vietnam this Sunday
POSTED: 10/14/10 12:43 PM

Hey Guys,

Just an update:

Adriana just informed me that High Cloud will be sponsoring Ironman Vietnam. She wanted to bring the whole team and have bottles up stations and the entire food spread at the end :) I told her that it wasn't necessary. However, High Cloud will bring gels, energy bars, and other food there for us to munch on at T-1, T-2, and the finish line.

Becky is the only one who is definitely running long distance after the ride. Others are in the "depends on how I feel" department. It looks like the IMCoz crew are taking over. We have 5 IMCoz participants in this event but sadly only one Vietnamese to run the show.

I checked the weather forecast for Cambridge. It looks like a spectacular day on loop 2 and the run leg. It should be sunny and in the low 70s. The swim start might be a little bit chilly with temps in the upper 50's. Not sure what the water temp is but who care? It's wetsuit legal.

As of right now, I am still the only male who is doing this race. Usually this is a good thing but I fear that some of those women will peer pressure me into sharing my feelings. Well, actually, Tony Consoldane is coming also but he's Italian. Matt Anderson is also coming but he's married. They might as well be chicks. For the love of God, are there any real dudes out there who will come and take the bullet for me? IS THERE?!!? I'm emotionally dead. I have no feelings ... but you know how women are.

Love,
Tuan

The Roster so far
-------------------
Ellen Wexler (IMWis 2011) - Doing the Ironman Vietnam Half course
Tony Consoldane - Doing the Ironman Vietnam Half course

Adriana Anderson (IMCoz)
Matt Anderson (IMCoz)
Debra Brosnihan (IMCoz)
Melissa Tallent (IMCoz)
Courtney Fulton (IMCoz)
Tuan (IMFL)
Becky H (IMFL)
Carol Cohen (B2B - Full)

eric guzmanaalv's ravatar eric guzmanaalv    JOINED: 2/28/09    POSTS: 140
RE: Ironman Vietnam this Sunday
POSTED: 10/14/10 1:10 PM

Add me for the for the Ironman Vietnam Half course
I am doing Miami 70.3 2weeks after

Eric

rah2774's ravatar rah2774    JOINED: 2/28/09    POSTS: 248
RE: Ironman Vietnam this Sunday
POSTED: 10/14/10 2:00 PM

Because I need to run for an hour after the ride, I may start with the pros and take off at 8:30 as opposed to waiting for the mass swim start (besides, after being annointed into the Vietnamese Royal Kingdom of Heaven last fall, I try to minimize elbow running with peasants). Hopefully I'll finish up the brick not too long after everyone else and can join in the post event festivities before you eat all the food at whatever restaurant we choose to go to.

FWIW, My first hour on the bike will be a warmup in Z1, so I suspect the speed demons may pass me... then I will settle in to a Z2 pace for the remainder. If all goes well and I'm not still in pain (translation, I can get my bike fit dialed in), I hope to be cruising at around an 18-19mph avg pace.

Oh, and thanks to the High Clouders for the SAG support!

dsgrunning's ravatar dsgrunning    JOINED: 2/28/09    POSTS: 1312
RE: Ironman Vietnam this Sunday
POSTED: 10/15/10 11:53 AM

Hey guys,

Last update before the greatest day of your lives.

We are two athletes away from not having to sacrifice a kitten. Are there at least two people out there who love kittens? Or, are you a bunch of haters? Plan on being there at 8:30 AM to stretch, set up, and fung shui your bike because we will start at 9:00 AM sharp.

We have a lot of 2010 Kona age group slots available. If you have race wheels or aero helmets, bring them. You'd be a fool not to. Below is the list of competitors for the 2010 Ironman Vietnam.


The Roster so far
-------------------

Ironman Vietnam 70.3 Participants
---------------------------------
Ellen Wexler
Tony Consoldane
Eric Guzamn
Rhyne Beniga
Hugh Harris (bike then 13.1 mile run)
Bob Leamon
Tristan Leamon
Sloan Mann

Ironman Vietnam 140.6 Participants
-----------------------------------
Adriana Anderson (IMCoz)
Matt Anderson (IMCoz)
Debra Brosnihan (IMCoz)
Melissa Tallent (IMCoz)
Courtney Fulton (IMCoz) - 30 min run after ride
Shireen Bashir (IMCoz)
Tuan (IMFL)
Becky H (IMFL) - 60 min run after ride
Carol Cohen (B2B - Full)
Sharon Kane (B2B - Full)

Tuan

mosered's ravatar mosered    JOINED: 2/28/09    POSTS: 1770
RE: Ironman Vietnam this Sunday
POSTED: 10/15/10 12:09 PM

As a strict adherent of traditional Vietnamese culture, I will aim for a "Vietnamese Century". 90 miles (English miles, not wussy French Indochinese metric miles). A 56-mile loop, then 17 out and back.


Anyone thinking of car pooling?

mosered's ravatar mosered    JOINED: 2/28/09    POSTS: 1770
RE: Ironman Vietnam this Sunday
POSTED: 10/17/10 5:38 PM

Geez, the Maryland authorities and the CIA again had it out for Tuan today, erasing the directional arrows for the ChesapeakeMan course, causing many of the King's minions to get lost, adding 4-10 miles to an already long and9 gusty course!

dsgrunning's ravatar dsgrunning    JOINED: 2/28/09    POSTS: 1312
RE: Ironman Vietnam this Sunday
POSTED: 10/17/10 7:19 PM

Don't forget about the bridge closure in the morning. Don't think that I missed that little shenanigan.

Thanks everyone for coming out especially Debra Brosnihan for pulling me 110 miles before Carol Cohen came in took care of business for the last 12 miles at 22 mph+. That's 22 mph+ AFTER 110 miles. DCTri has some seriously strong female cyclists ... beasts on the bike.

Tuan

ellenwex's ravatar ellenwex    JOINED: 11/16/09    POSTS: 66
RE: Ironman Vietnam this Sunday
POSTED: 10/17/10 10:14 PM

Tuan, Just wanted to say thank you for organizing the ride today... and well... every Sunday!

What would I do without you? (Probably the same thing you'd do without Debra and Carol to pull you - be SLOW) :)

Ellen

mosered's ravatar mosered    JOINED: 2/28/09    POSTS: 1770
RE: Ironman Vietnam this Sunday
POSTED: 10/18/10 10:27 AM

National Security Agency (NSA), Fort Meade, Maryland. Intercepted transmission. Wednesday, Oct. 14, 2010, 2:32 PM.


MD state trooper 1: Did you hear how that Tuan character is having ANOTHER sports event in our state?

MD state trooper 2: You mean the guy who put on PeasantMan at Sandy Point Park--without a permit?

Trooper 1: Actually, he obtained strong verbal approval twelve months in advance. But he did make our brothers in the Maryland Rec Department have to get up early on a Sunday morning.

Now he’s organized a Vietnamese Ironman at Great Swamp Park in Cambridge for this Sunday.

Trooper 2: All the way up in Massachusetts?

T1: No, Cambridge, Maryland!

T2: That’s our turf again. What we gonna do about it?

T1: Remember how, when we heard he was bringing a big group to the EagleMan race there this spring, we motor-boated out to the buoys the night before, and attached extra-long ropes, to make the swim much longer?

T2: Sure. Juan, or Tuan, or whatever his name is, is a really fast biker and runner, but he doggy-paddles like one of his native nation’s favorite cuisines. We almost made him miss the swim cut-off!

T1: Let’s mess up his Ironman too. Drive over there the night before, and erase the directional arrows on the bike course. All his bikers will get lost in the great swamp!

T2: Great idea, and I got another! We’re buddy-buddy with all the unions in Cambridge, right?

T1: Cambridge, England?

T2: No, Cambridge, Maryland! Let’s ask them to block the bridge leading from town center to the race start at Swamp Park. That’ll cause a bunch of racers to get there late.

T1. Ha ha. And, you know how the construction gangs are repaving the course, from all the pounding the roads take from those 15-pound bikes? Let’s ask them to hold off for now, leaving the potholes covered with nothing but gravel. That will mess up those fancy-pants riders.

T2. Perfect. And I wonder if there’s anything we could do about the weather. I got some contacts at the CIA, and the NSA, who work in cloud seeding, you know, where you drop iodine into the air, causing it to rain like crazy wherever you want.

T1. Forget about it: those guys at the NSA are a bunch of screw-ups. Besides, even in crystal-clear weather, the winds out on the swamp are hurricane-force. Tuan’s people are gonna go through hell no matter what.

I got a better notion. Remember how we helped gin up public sentiment against the Annapolis Triathlon a few years back?

T2. Sure, the town cancelled the race.

T1. Well, the Annapolis Tri Club had a world-class contingent of female bikers. Ever since their tri was cancelled, they’ve been anxious to do another race.

T2. I catch your drift. We tell them about this race. And maybe get our buds at the CIA to doll them up in DC Tri uniforms.

T1. Right. You know how Vaughan, or Tuan, or whatever his name is, likes to brag about how he’s got a set of extra cojones? Just think how he’ll feel after getting dropped by squad of super-fast chicks on his favorite course!

T2. Instead of a Prince to a Vietnam King, he’ll be more like a eunuch to the Turkish Sultan!

T1. And all the other guys in the race will have their delicate male egos squashed when these racer gals whiz past. They'll be too embarrassed to show up for a race again.

T2. Ha ha ha....Well, I’m starved—gotta head back to Dunkin’ D.

T1. Gotta take off myself: to my moonlighting gig with the DC park police. We’re planning to hand out a bunch of speeding citations at Hains Point today.

dsgrunning's ravatar dsgrunning    JOINED: 2/28/09    POSTS: 1312
RE: Ironman Vietnam this Sunday
POSTED: 10/18/10 10:51 AM

Ed ... that was awesome

rah2774's ravatar rah2774    JOINED: 2/28/09    POSTS: 248
RE: Ironman Vietnam this Sunday
POSTED: 10/18/10 2:30 PM

wow, Ed, that was awesome! Glad to know the cops didn't talk to the NSA bc if the weather were any crazier I would still be crying and shaking in a corner. Instead I'm simply nursing wicked wind burn on my face and lips.
Awesome job everyone! I managed the 112 despite the bad and/or nonexistent markings - after my first loop of 70 miles I went out and back 21... then ran for an hour. Lesson learned and executed: plan for contingencies and carry extra nutrition/water, sunscreen, and chapstick!

mosered's ravatar mosered    JOINED: 2/28/09    POSTS: 1770
RE: Ironman Vietnam this Sunday
POSTED: 10/19/10 9:24 AM

It didn't take long for the Fraternity of Troopers to strike back.

This morning, while riding to work, I was ticketed by a City of Alexandria policeman! For going slowly and carefully through a stop sign with no traffic around.

I know King Tuan is paranoid, but am I paranoid-delusional? Could this have actually happened? Yes, here's the summons in my grease-stained fingers. $35.

I'm sending an invoice to the Treasury of Vietnam. Business expense.

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